Lollipops and Brownies

I really do have the best husband in the world.  I am sure that giving nightly shots isn’t his cup of tea, but he is always patient and gentle, even when I regress back to a 3 year old.  The other day, I was having an exceptionally difficult time with receiving the shots, to the point that I was in tears.  Michael suggested I think of some of my favorite things, so I said lollipops and brownies. He then proceeded to turn it into a song.

Lollipops ad Brownies, Lollipops and brownies
Lollipops and Brownies are a unicorn’s favorite food

He now sings it to me every night as he is giving me the shots.  We will probably have to add on to it.

I had another check up today. The right ovary decided it didn’t want to be left out and joined in the fun. We had a couple of 12s and 13s on. The left side has had about 8 follicles ranging 13 and 17. I’ll be going back on Wednesday, but they expect that will be the last scan, so only two more nights of multiple shots. There will be one more injection, a trigger shot for ovulation and then it will be retrieval time!

I'll be back on Wednesday.

xoxox
Love & Baby Dust

Day 10

One thing I have learned about myself this week is that I never have to worry about becoming a heroin addict. I really do detest the shot. Right now I am up to three shots a night.  The doctor added Ganirelix to monthly injections to prevent premature ovulation.

I had a doctor's appointment yesterday to see how things are progressing.  Apparently my right ovary is being very lazy and the left one is doing all the work.  The doctor is expecting for the retrieval to take place towards the end of the week.

A funny thing did happen at the doctors yesterday. I had my legs up in the stirrups waiting for the ultrasound and the doctor inserts the probe and says "It will just be a minute, we are having computer issues". It was terribly awkward and I felt a little violated. It was definitely different from when I tell clients to hold for a minute because I am having computer issues

I'll be back at the doctor tomorrow morning and we will see what they see.

In other news, we put up our Christmas tree today. Christmas time is my favorite time of year.

XOXO

Love & Baby Dust

Day 3

I had a brief moment of panic today when I realized Michael wasn't going to be home in time tonight to give me my injections. For about half a second I considered doing it myself, but I started getting nauseous. I then asked my mom to help out, but she turned a little green.  Thankfully, my sister has come to the rescue. My niece and nephew both had PICC lines when they were younger, so she isn't too squeamish.  She will be arriving tonight to help me out. I am a little nervous though.  I am just now starting to not feel anxious when it time for Michael to do it. I am sure it will be fine though.

I am starting to have some minor side effects  from the medications.  The last two nights I woke up with hot flashes and today I have been so exhausted. I haven't felt like doing too much.  After my walk and breakfast I vegged out on the couch for about 5 hours.  I finally got up and went grocery shopping and did a little housework, but now I am just relaxing waiting for my sister to get here, before I turn in for the night.

I have three doctor appointments this week for Trans-vaginal ultrasounds and blood work  Oh Joy, more needles. My appointments are all at 8 in the morning and I am expecting them to last 2 hours. There is always a wait at the doctor's office.I'll be working 11-8 this week. It is going to be a long week. But I am going to my best to not stress and to get a lot of rest. I'm growing winning eggs.

*edit* My sister did a great job giving me my shots!

xoxox
Love & Baby Dust

Let the injections begin

I hate needles and I tend to freak out a little bit when it is time for me to get blood drawn or to get a shot.  I haven't had much of a choice other than to just get over it, with all the blood work I have done lately.  But giving myself a shot? Nope! No way! Never going to happen.  Fortunately my dear husband Michael is up to challenge and had a little bit of training from his military days.

We decided that 9:00 will be the magic time to take my shot each night. Around 8:45 I started to get notice but began to get everything all set up.  The shots were actually easier than I thought. I think Michael missed his calling he could have been a doctor or a nurse.

In case you were wondering, the doctor has me on 20 units of low dose hCG and 400 units of Follistim.

I need to be sure to take a belly picture, from what I understand there will be a lot of bloat with this medication.  I am just hoping it doesn't make me crazy, well at least not any crazier than I already am.

XOXOX
Love & Baby Dust

First Steps

Today I updated my Facebook status to “Today I embark on a new journey”.  The more I think about it, I realize it isn't a new journey I am taking. This is the path I have been on my entire life. It’s my destiny to be a mom.  There have been many disappointments and detours along the way, but I am finally back on the right track. I'll be turning 35 next month; this part of my journey is starting about 10 years later than I originally planned.  It’s funny the way life has a way of getting in the way of plans.

I believe everything happens for a reason therefore when something doesn't happen it is for a reason too. Ten years ago, I really wasn't ready for a child of my own. I spent my late teens and early twenties in a series of unhealthy relationships. I was to insecure and spent too much time in the darkness to bring a child in the world.

Then I met my wonderful husband and I thought, well now must be the time.  But, he spent too much time working overseas and I wanted an active partner in raising a child.  I also needed to spend those years leaning how to be a stepmom. It isn't always easy helping to raise someone else’s child, but is very rewarding.

Now the time is right, the stars are aligned, the insurance is in place, and my crappy work schedule is actually perfect for the numerous doctors’ appointments I will have to go during the next few weeks.

Today I had my baseline appointment; they did an ultrasound and took some blood. The ultrasound looked great and assuming the blood works comes back OK to I will start taking injections at the end of the week.

I am so blissfully happy, just knowing that this first step has been taken.  I hope you will continue to walk along this path with me. 

xoxox

Love & Baby Dust

My Optimism gets the best of me again.

I knew this round of the IUI wasn't going to work. I resigned myself to the fact. I told my husband and BFF that I knew it wasn't going to work. I started making plans for IVF in the future. In my head I knew it wasn't going to work.  Mentally I had accepted.  Someone forgot to tell my heart though.  My cycle started today and I was devastated.  It really doesn't get easier.

But I had myself a good cry and I'll be taking January and February off.  I'll be ready to begin IVF in March.

Resolutions

I have been a total slacker with writing in here, but I will do better in 2012.  Our first three IUI attempts were not sucessful and the last failure was particulary hard for me. I found out I wasn't pregnant just after my birthday and right before Christmas. At the same time I found out one of my cousins and his wife are expecting. Let's just say it was an emotional time for me.

This mornng we are up early on New Year's Eve for our last shot at IUI. If this doesn't work the doctor thinks we should move onto IVF.  Michael isn't much a morning person, as evident by the fact that he just growled at me.

I had to stop writing yesterday because it was time to leave.  The IUI went well yesterday.  We made it to the doctor at 8 and first up was for Michael to make his donation.  There was only one other couple there and they were called back first and the husband went in by himself.  I always wonder if it is strange that I go back with Michael.  Once we were done we had to wait an hour so we had our traditional breakfast at Panera's.

When we returned the doctor did the insemination and we discussed the possibility of IVF.  Michael was very happy with the doctor's instructions to have sex everyday for the rest of the long weekend. I am hopeful, but realistically I am not expecting the IUI to work. I am starting to my prepare myself for having to do the IVF.